Lily wakes up to X marks the spot

February 12, 2013


Everything I am told has limits. Push a car too hard and the gear box might just give out. the same goes for words. I can’t describe how or even why Lily reacted the way she did. I just can’t. Not with the limitation of words at least.

Looking at her after I had just returned from hunting a piglet hog – I watched as she walked out and first laid eyes on the emerald lagoon in where X marks the spot.

She was just wearing my shirt and nothing else. For a moment she looked like a bewildered woman. Perhaps she was asking herself, “where am I?” – “where is this place that you have spirited me too?” Looking on at a spell bound Lily as she spun and twirled on deck half gasping and breathless. I did consider maybe all the girls in the world were divided into two classes: one category included all the girls in the world except Lily, and they had all the usual human feelings and were in every sense girls who have never been pushed to their limits. While the other class – Lily – who had always believed she had seen and savoured all that life could possibly offer now realized – she had reached her limit.

Perhaps now she realized, she had seen so very little of life and experienced even less of it. What after all could have accounted for the strange manner in which Lily behaved?

Yes…All she had was perhaps the illusion that she had lived all that life had to offer. Yes…that has to be it – what else can account for Lily’s complete haplessness – with this realization the finality of the idea must have permeated her soul that if she could be wrong about life – what else could she be wrong about? It wasn’t really so much the unspeakable beauty of X that really did Lily in. No that wasn’t it. It was the idea that someone would be prepared to allow another to enter into the inner sanctum of his soul so willingly, so freely.

Sure X marks the spot is breath takingly beautiful. But as I looked on at the woman who seemed to be taking in the sights and sounds like some hungry being who was just content to fill her empty heart. Perhaps it had more to do with Lily’s unshakeable belief giving way to a new awareness -Lily after all prided herself with the uncommon ability to read a man – that day when I had taken her for a spin in her new Lamborghini she had deliberately arranged it to remind that I was a man with a past.

Now that same air of assurance, superiority and élan that had always clung to her like some vapor had all but diminished – leaving a woman who was simply not even sure of the world any longer.

I wondered to myself as I stood there on deck watching Lily. If Lily could believe she could be wrong about life. Perhaps she could also entertain the belief, she’s wrong about me as well.

If you really need to know what drives women like Lily to deliberately seek men like me out to toy with in the way a cat plays mockingly with a helpless mouse. Its because men like me have always hurt her – that’s why when she sees me in a bush jacket trying to live the planter’s life – Lily believes I am living a sham life. In all fairness, she’s probably right. As there is very little that is real about me in the planter’s way of life – but that’s business.

I wanted to tell Lily there and then that I am not the man who once hurt her. I may carry myself like him or even have the same air about me. But I am not that man.

I am not even angry that she ruined my CNY plans with my family. I am just a man who wanted to share with her something pure and innocent. Something that is part of this world, yet stands aloof from it – like a cloud city or a floating world. Above all I wanted to tell Lily that all I want to do in life is to lead my life; to hurt no one, except maybe me should I screw it all up.

But I didn’t have to tell her all these things – soon Lily settled into a sort of calmness or resignation. I wasn’t clear to me what it was – only the look she flashed me before she slipped out of my shirt and dived into the emerald lagoon – suggested, she understood all these and much more.

Now I have to make a killer brunch.

Darkness 2013



1. 5 pepper corns crushed.
2. one whole tea cup of honey.
3. 3 table spoon of extra olive virgin oil
4. A bunch of curry leaf – just buy two bunches from ntuc fair price.
5. 4 table spoon of chili sauce
6. 500 grammes of pork sirloin (better still wild boar)
7. One cup of Hennessy cognac to flame
8. Shitake Mushrooms
9. English mustard
10. Palm cooking oil 4 table spoon (never use soybean oil, it makes you stupid. Choose palm oil all the time!)
11. One spoonful of full cream butter.


– Swirl palm oil into a shallow pan. Crush peppercorns (not too fine). Fry till flavor comes out. At half of curry leaves and fry till flagrant. Cut sirloin into two halves about 250 grammes each. Salt if required. Served flamed with Cognac.

– Shitake Mushroom sauce.
Heat up one spoonful of butter in a shallow frying pan. Add curry leaves. Once fragrant add 200 grammes of Shitake (I use the ones I find in X). Make sure the mushrooms are dry and not dripping with water. Paper towel them if necessary. Or they will come out soggy. Add a dash of cognac. Add more butter to thicken the sauce. takes about 45 minutes to thicken. Once fire is off. Stirr in one teaspoon of English mustard to give it a zing. Serve hot.

Serving Directions:

– Serve with baby carrots and sweet potatoes. If you cant get sweet potatoes. Go for Japanese potatoes.

1. Crush pepper corn and

Darkness 2013

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