Log 11-8-13 The God of War & The final act.
August 11, 2013
A big part of business is to manage change and conflict effectively – that’s because business and change is synonymous – and it’s not altogether so different from throwing a stone into a calm lake – it’s bound to cause ripples.
I do not care what the Harvard Business School has to say about this – as once a new kid moves into an established neighborhood – that very idea if bound to provoke all sorts of negative reactions.
This underscores the need to prioritize the skill sets needed to manage change and conflict intelligently.
Most people, including myself, shy away from conflict resolution – that I imagine is only natural. As when others don’t like us. It’s understandable to just avoid them and even wish they disappear magically away. But we all know that’s never going to happen. They will always be there in the foreground – and that’s where the problem begins to fester.
That’s why I believe when it comes to even smallest of misunderstandings such as a hurtful SMS, blog entry or words of anger that threatens to sour a relationship leading to broken fellowship – never leave it too long, till it mushrooms – deal with it in a timely and up front manner – NEVER for one moment take comfort in the idea that time will heal old wounds. Or if you just ignore it, it will somehow just go away.
That to me is a very childish way of seeing the world. As 9 out of 10 times, if we don’t prioritize the need to mend broken fellowship within a given period of time – all that will happen is positions will begin to calcify, the otherside will begin to dig in and the next thing you know both sides will find themselves engaged in a costly war of attrition – when that happens it is almost impossible to return back to that happy cosy place where the relationship used to be soft and gentle and this can only mean trust will fritter away.
Without trust, let me tell you this. There is absolutely no basis for cooperation. No basic raw material even to forge such a thing called common ground, let alone hammer out a common set of values.
All you really have is the perfect conditions for enmity, resentment and anger to take root and grow like some evil weed to strangle everything that was once good and worthy in that relationship.
So if words of anger are exchanged. Go kiss and make up. When blows are traded, be man enough to knock on the other and settle whatever outstanding accounts in the spirit of brotherhood – NEVER procrastinate. NEVER take cold comfort in the idea time will heal – as how can it?
Time can NEVER heal. As for leaving it to Jesus – that’s just another convenient way of doing fuck all – that sort of lackadaisical attitude can only exacerbate the conflict heightening it up to a new level – where both sides may even begin to embark on an arms race. And when that happens what you will invariably end up with is two sides facing off against each other in no man’s land – when those conditions are met, it’s almost impossible to intelligently manage conflict any longer. As what you have inadvertently created is the God of war.
And when that end point is reached. You will have very little options to do anything else – as it’s no longer a case of how well you play the game. As it remains the very tragic case of how the God of war demands that the game plays you.
“My life is very sad. I say this not with a measure of regret. Rather my hope is that others will read of it and hopefully they will not commit the same mistake I once did.
As in all honestly when I first ventured into business – although I did not have much money and no one really thought much of me – I was relatively happy in a simple Simon sort of way.
But these days it seems I have grow so distant and far from the whole idea of happiness, friendship and even family. To me now, it is like a faraway country that you may sometimes come across in a picture postcard – its there, but you are so removed from it – that it might as well be on the surface of the moon.
It would not be an exagerration to say, if you were to peer deep into my heart and mind – all you will discover is desolation and emptiness.
All you will probably see is a man who is hell bent on destroying his enemies – it is this singularity of purpose and will that has managed to kill off the other aspects of my life I reckon – as all you will discover is a man who has dedicated himself to one purpose – to enlarge his land holdings – to buy more and more land, till everything belongs to him and his enemies are vanquished.
That in the palm of your hands is the goal. The only goal. I live only for this mission.
Some people live for their hobbies. Others to experience the sights and sounds of every nook and cranny of this wonderful world. Then again there are those who dedicate themselves to pursuits that may bring peace and happiness to their fellow men. I imagine there may even be others who may live through their children to experience success vicariously through them etc etc etc – but not me.
I live only to see the end of those who once made my life into a living hell – nothing in this world will give me more pleasure than to sit on the table and dictate terms to them. To see them cringe at my very presence. To see them getting smaller and smaller, till poof, they just vanish into thin air.
To cut a long story short. Once my enemies lands are mine to call my own – I will lead a very different life – I will play golf on alternate days. Dine in the same restaurant every evening. I will live as predictable a life as can be possibly lived – and this life of familiarity and regularity will be known to all to such an extent that they can even say to others – on Wednesday at eight, this man always comes here to play a round on mahjong…..on Friday’s he always likes to sit on the table over looking the lake in the Planter’s where this man has the unusual habit of lashing his halibut with tartar sauce. My life will have to be very predictable…..it will be a life as open a book as any…a very different life from the life, I am leading now – where it is impossible for you to even see me without passing through at least seven levels of security clearance.
Let me just say this. It is impossible for you or for that matter anyone to just see me and have a casual conversation.
But in this last chapter of my life – since I have already accomplished every aspect of my mission – what else is there to do except to prepare for death to take me to the other side.
Do you see how life is really not so different from the theater – as that is really the curtain call. The last act so to speak, for me.
Let me share with you how this final act will be played out.
The man is dining in the restaurant all by himself. There is nothing unusual about this. As he always dines alone. A lone assasin will walk in – when he appears bearing a pistol, the other diners will stream out nervously. Some may even scream. Others will just run as fast as they can – but this one man will stay and remain.
As the gun man approaches his table – the man will put down his cutlery calmly, wipe his mouth and take a sip of his claret. He knows the time has come. Nothing can surprise him. As he has replayed this scene in his mind a thousand times – he knows it so well that he even knows how to calm down the nervous gun man.
When the gun is leveled at this man – he will not cringe. Instead he will look directly into the barrel and simply express to this lone gunman or maybe himself or perhaps even to providence – today is a very good day to die.
I realize this is something that most people can never understand. Most people will even consider it macabre and fictional.
But it matters very little to me what others may think – as what remains pertinent here is that I myself have the full presence of mind to understand why it must be this way.
You see there is no other way. But this one way. I have gone through it a thousand times in my head. As I will cause my enemies to go through so much grief – that this is really the only way for them to close this hellish chapter.
Thereafter the curtain comes down. The end….do not be sad….smile…as that is how I planned to end it…on my own terms that is.”