Managing love sustainably

It’s perfectly natural to look for someone to complete a missing part of your life….If you don’t feel a deep yearning to fulfill this desire…you’re probably in denial of the strongest human impulse that canals thru your veins.

However if you’re searching for love. It’s needs to be approached intelligently. Love is not a casual thing. Not to me at least. I see it as both a wonderful and destructive force, salvation or perdition, a force for good or evil, that is why I have immense respect for this powerful human impulse and treat it with great care and attention that it deserves.

One needs to first prepare for love. To love. And to be part of it.

If one looks for love without FIRST getting the things that needs to be righted first…. instead of enjoying all the goodness of love. You will probably discover grief and hurt.

This is one biggest mistake most men and women commit – they simply fail to understand it’s not possible to gainfully make any progress forward by putting the horse before the cart…..it’s no good…it’s on the wrong side. For the horse to pull wagon, it’s got to be facing forward so that it can pull the wagon.

It’s the same when it comes to a man or woman looking for love. One must first work to be mentally and spiritually whole, complete and strong first BEFORE one can even begin looking for that special person to share one’s life journey with.

If one is damaged goods and the direct opposites of whole and complete – then all one will do is bring past hurts, resentments and anger into the new relationships. It’s like mixing old with new wine – it can only turn the good sour.

Instead of enjoying mutual growth and all the abundance life has to offer to two people who love each other. All you are doing is living in the shadow of the hurtful past and soon you will see these past ghost appear in your partner again….you will. You may not even be consciously aware of this process – but because you are still damaged goods, it is really only a matter of time before these past demons will surface and cause both you and this person who you consider to be your soulmate grief.

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‘Most men shy away from the subject of love. But not me. Past hurts and resentments don’t ever die and just go away. They don’t. They’re up there somewhere nestled deep in one corner of your mind. You’re not even conscious of it most of the time, but trust me it’s there.

And if we don’t deal with them and set them aside in the way a man makes peace with a grudge, wrong or hurtful episode by putting it all in an old cigar box and burying it in the backyard….chances are these ghost will reappear again.

You will see it….a little goes a long way. And when these ghost reappear a storm of hurtful memories will all come back and spoil the present – could be the way your partner keeps calling you up ten million times a day to ask you where you are….who are you with…or even the way he or she looks at someone. It could be a thousand other things that only you know because only you have experienced it first hand.’