Learning the very important things about life

August 6, 2016

We spend the best years of our lives preparing ourselves by studying math, science, history, geography etc etc and thereafter we spend more time striving to get our degree – yet what is very curious (to me at least) is we rarely see ever see need to set aside some quiet time to study how to love and be loved…or even how to manage relationships so that we get the best out of it instead of destroying us…. or even going deeper into our core to get to know ourselves better.

To me this whole idea of preparing oneself for the world is woefully out of balance…as 99.9% of it is merely focussed on the developing and mastering the life tools – yes, life tools like fractions and being able to pay out the right dollar bills as well as being able to audit the returns are certainly important. Only how one goes about prioritizing the list of importance seems very disproportionate to me…that so much time and energy should only be directed towards WHAT we need to develop to satisfy others…so that we can fall into their slots of what is organizational and personal success…acceptable…normal…correct etc etc. We seem to do so much for others and so very little for ourselves.

Please don’t get me wrong…I am not for one moment saying math, science or physics is not important – indeed they are all valuable life tools that we all need to enable us to manage ourselves and others effectively….only there has to be a sense of scale and the right perspective as to how we see the bigger picture.

For example striving to understand for corners of the self is not as straight forward as striving to master a subject like math where there’s an easy and direct connection between cause and effect. When it comes to understanding a subject like ‘who am I?’

There are no tried and tested pathways – there is no such thing as even a syllabus…it’s the opposite of straight forward linear learning. Many insights concerning who we are can only be gleaned by spending more time immersing ourselves in ourselves, till the searcher journeys right down to the core of his being.


‘When you are a stranger to yourself. It simply means you don’t know who you are or even why you were born into this timeline….not knowing may seem benign and even downright harmless, but if I am asked why so many people, not only in Singapore but the whole wide world continue to suffer unnecessarily…it really comes down to ignorance of the self.

When one is a stranger to oneself – the self is like a building constructed on soft sand…the foundations will always be shaky and unstable…and this is how it is when a man or woman does not know himself or herself.

He or she can only be shaky. It is very easy to unsettle such people…all that needs to be done is to push their buttons and they will jump like a demented Jack in the box….they are always shaky…when a woman sees another woman who is more beautiful than her…she will begin to shake. Same applies to a man…he will begin bristling like a porcupine and he will even turn beet root and given more time, he will be like a hand grenade with it’s pin working loose.

That is because not knowing anything about the most important person in the planet – yourself!

Is the root of all insecurities, fears, anxieties and deep seated feelings of inferiority.

When a man knows himself completely. Suddenly he comes into the bigger picture of life…suddenly that which was once considered important becomes trivial as it assumes the right scale and perspective – the self disappears completely… and the ego assumes the right scale in relation to this man’s higher purpose….it’s very difficult to shake such a man.

You can even throw him in prison. He will not shake.

That is why I have always considered this a form of superpower.

Such a man is so confident about himself that he can hold his own amongst kings and princes dressed like a beggar…even should you slight, insult or try to put him down, it’s like a mosquito bitting an elephant – no effect!

But where does this quiet confidence come from?


Deep within the self. As mastering self knowledge is not like striving to understand mathematics or geography – it requires the man to go inwards…deep…deeper into his very core. Above all it’s not a process of learning. Rather it requires unlearning the ways of world…always discarding the useless..worthless and vapid along with setting aside illusions till one can only be at one with the truth.

This is what it means when others say, he is very comfortable in his own skin…it’s not that the man doesn’t give a damn…No! It simply means, he knows who he is and he doesn’t need your validation to remain happy and to live a purpose driven life.

Strive always to get to know yourself better – when you do just this alone….you will find many things in this world that used to disturb and irritate you will disappear completely. As you have begun the most important journey in life – the epic journey to close the circle.’

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