Whenever possible avoid politicking

This morning. A fuming landowner complained to me – the village elders had allocated him a table next to the toilet for the upcoming Chap Goh Meh celebrations…he fumed…’how dare they insult me in this manner?’ – ‘do they not know who I am…’ I told this man to calm down and call up the organizers of the event to seek further clarification.

After he had cooled down – he called the organizers and was informed the table allocated to him was no where near the toilet as due to the sheer number of guest attending – new toilet facilities would be built elsewhere.

He was very happy after that…before this landowner departed he asked me, ‘where will you be sitting.’ I told him in my plantation. He seemed surprised, when he realized I was not even invited….and he asked, ‘aren’t you insulted?’

I said in the past I would have certainly considered it a great insult….he concurred with me by thinking aloud…’after all you are a substantial landowner in these parts…you may be comparatively young, but nonetheless your land holdings should at least be recognized and respected….all I could manage as a reply was…it is not a big thing. Besides I care very little about such petty things these days….they no longer seem to be important.

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‘The story of man. The social animal is a very curious story. Here we have a character who is not so different from a bumble bee who flits from flower to flower. At times, he’s happiest when he discovers a sweet treat, but within the blink of an eye he falls sullen as he discovers nothing there and so his mood is perpetually on a roller coaster ride of up’ and down’s.

One moment he is happy…the next sad and at other times indifferent….and so it goes on like this thru the day…up and down.

This is what happens when a man falls into the ego trap and becomes all too invested in the idea of his alter ego – call it what you may, in Chinese business parlance, it’s face….in the western conception…self worth or self esteem.

My point is when one is constantly soliciting approval, respect and validation from others – one can really only be bubbling all the time in an illusion of who you are and what’s your worth….YOU WILL NEVER KNOW YOURSELF! YOU WILL ALWAYS FALL SHORT and you will NEVER be able to find real contentment.

As since so much of your self worth is premised on the external and not the internal – the opinions of others who hardly know of you…your mental well being will always be held hostage by others….how much sense does that make?

None whatsoever in my opinion….hence it makes far more sense for one to internalize the idea of self worth without the noise of society….granted this is definitely counter intuitive…only because man by nature is a social animal…but consider this: if a man does not learn to stand on his own two feet….then how can he possibly know deep down who he really is?

That is why WHAT you think about yourself is in my opinion far more important and valuable than what others may think about you!

True confidence, contentment and deep sense of identity and mission is not something to be sought after, out there in the vast expanse of the world…..it is to be realized deep within the self.’