Keeping a balance on socializing

October 31, 2016

It is certainly one good thing to be a social animal – to be able to respond in ways that makes others comfortable and feel at ease; to always have impeccable timing when to speak and to listen etc etc; to even be liked by all.

But it is all together another thing to invest so much of oneself in the lives and intrigues of others to such a point where one’s being disappears completely. Or worst still becomes so diffused that the whole idea of character becomes so fuzzy that one does not even know what one’s life should be or how one should go about crafting a meaningful life.

Love by all means. Love unconditionally. Love in such a way that you don’t even hold back. Only understand this! Never confuse love with the renunciation of the self to such a point where you cease to completely to exist and that you are really only alive or living when you are with that someone who you love. As when you have convinced yourself you can only be happy, confident and whole with the person who you love – then all you have accomplished is fashioning yourself as the assassin of your being: result: you’ll be disappointed. As that is what invariably happens when so much of WHO you are is predicated on someone else who you hardly have any control over….you only think or believe, you can control….but in reality….you can control nothing, and you might as well come to terms with this terrible reality.

In truth. All you ever really had from the beginning, during and after the end of your life was yourself, and though that sort of reality may suck big time – if you can just come to terms with that. Then maybe. Maybe….perhaps you would invest more on yourself instead of spreading yourself so thinly like the last dollop of peanut butter in a jar on the lives of other people.


‘Most people have a quaint picture in their head when it comes to the frontier man. In the image they conjure somewhere in some sugary corner of their head – he’s the macho man…the man of steel…the man who can tame cantankerous machinery, make do with super glue and duct tape. The sort of man who prefers the company of dogs. A man of few words. The man who stands with one foot on his fence in one corner of his land at the end of the day when the light wanes and watches one season bow out to another only for life to go on as it’s always gone on.

But that depiction is part fantasy and make belief.

Truth is we are all. Without a single exception. Each and everyone frontier men and women in one shape or form. We just don’t realize it because everything in modern living is designed to gut out that reality and replace it with an alternate parallel universe that lulls us all to think and behave otherwise.

We all come into this world with a hand of cards dealt by the twin heads of providence and serendipity – some if they’re luckier than others have aces, kings and queens. Others who aren’t so lucky have to settle for a bum hand – maybe they’re born flat footed. Maybe they’re short and stumpy and don’t look too pleasing to the eye. Or like me maybe they’re slightly autistic and have to constantly struggle with the duality of the world that is and what everyone expects them to be. My point is everyone comes into this world with their own set of challenges that ONLY they have the capacity to resolve and when one sees the world in this singularity of purpose – then it becomes very clear what’s worthy and useless.

Just focus on your lot. Don’t bother too much about others and what they may think about you. If they consider you odd. So what? Does that really change or alter anything at all in the larger scheme of things? Tell me…does it?

Hey! I’ve got news for you! Not everyone likes me. Some people think that I am a ruthless businessman who gives no quarter. They spread all sorts of evil rumors concerning me because I keep to myself and do my own thing and never ever stick my nose into other people’s lives or even feel the need to hang around and gossip.

I do my own thing.

But what they don’t know is what I am really doing is tending to orchard of my being – that’s to say I am investing every moment of my live shaping myself to be the best farmer that I can be.

You don’t like me that’s your problem – I am not going to lose sleep over it.

The most important thing to me is never be distracted by the world – the world is full of nonsense that really adds very little to one’s life. That’s how the world is – and that’s the first lesson every frontier man comes to terms with….it really just boils down to him and him alone and no one else but him! Not others. Certainly not the government or for even than man in the pulpit who keeps asking you to give 10% of your salary so that you can get back ten fold…all that is bullshit to the frontier man.

Just focus on bettering your lot. Do that alone and I can almost guarantee you that life will certainly improve by leaps and bounds. As for the rest you could just as well throw it all out of the window. It would hardly make an ounce of difference to the final outcome!

Truth is often stranger than fiction. We are all born with field. A place where we can either let it give all of itself to the wild or tend diligently to produce sweet fruit. Yes truth is often stranger than fiction. As there is really a farmer in all of us deep down….you just have to find him!

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