The maturity to be yourself

August 26, 2017

Most people suffer unnecessarily because they find it very difficult to accept themselves. Often their militant refusal to accept themselves is the main reason why they much prefer to live a life where they spend most of their time pretending to be someone else.

Today in the digital age it is remarkably easy to be everyone and anyone else except yourself. All that is needed is an instagram account and a good photoshop app and you are good to go.

The inability to accept oneself is not just a singular flaw. As it is the foundation that all other human character is built on. Because if one has trouble in that department, then it is impossible to build anything solid on something that resembles jelly. As the inability to accept oneself also means it will be impossible for one to love oneself or even to be forgiving and gentle to oneself.

But if one has the courage to accept oneself. One will have truly begun the journey towards being a more mature person. Be the person you are. Maturity is accepting the responsibility of being oneself, whatever the cost. No matter what anyone else thinks or says. Risking all to be oneself, that’s what maturity is all about.


‘The entire purpose of a human life can be distilled not into four, three or even two goals. Rather it all converges into ONLY one ultimate goal in my humble opinion and that is for one to strive to attain maturity.

Because intelligence without maturity can only be very dangerous. So is wealth without maturity, it can often be self destructive. Talent without maturity is even worse. As it can only lead to avarice and a premature death. As for good looks without maturity, it can only be wasted. And you can say this about virtually every aspect of human endeavour…everything ranging from religion to bicycle maintenance, when it is not sensibly coupled with maturity, it will all go downhill.

That is why never set your eyes on the world. As the way of the world is always to hold you by the nose and tell you like a wide eyed immature child – you need this or that to complete your life…you must be like so and so etc etc just to be happy and lead a purpose driven life. Notice the world never says – You are fine! You are OK! You are good to go!

No! They never ever say that!

They are always trying to plant either this or that flag on your head…always trying to selling you, me and everyone else something better, faster and newer. Always trying to engineer a fictitious deficit somewhere in your life so that they can justify why you should buy into the wisdom of their marketing manifesto….they have too, otherwise their business model will simply collapse.

Recently on my last shopping trip to the mall to stock up on provisions. I looked at a tube of anti Aging Neutrogena face wash for a very long time. When the contract Girlfriend asked me why since she has never seen me browsing around the toiletries section before. I sheepishly showed her a photo of Chuando and said that I would very much like to look like him since my skin has been ravaged by the recent replanting project.

But when she explained to me I also need to get a cleanser to go with the face wash along with a day and night moisturiser and possibly an ultra sonic face cleaner plus spf 50 sun block plus chap stick to stop my lips from cracking along with ten other stuff that I can’t seem to recall. I would also need to trim my eyebrows. Stay away from the sun. Eat only egg white and steamed chicken breast seven times a day. Exercise every alternate day. Sleep twelve hours. Etc etc etc etc.

After hearing all that I felt quite embarrassed and silly and decided to put that magical anti Aging tube of face wash back on the shelf again.

As in my whole life my only toiletry has been only a bar of soap. I don’t even use shampoo.

I guess what I am trying to say is that’s really who I am. I have always been a man who needs very little to get by….I take exceptional pride in my ability to live a simple life free from all affectations and even if I never get to look like Chuando on the account of the philosophy…somehow after hearing the litany of what I need to do to get to look like Chuando. I don’t think it’s that important to me any longer.

Maybe I should just accept myself…wrinkles and all.’

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