Contract Girlfriend – on love

December 23, 2017

Contract Girlfriend declared her love for me. I told her, it is not that you love me. Rather it is fear that drives you to me. Fear that age is catching up…fear that up to now you still don’t have a plan B on how to live the other half of your life on your own terms…fear that you will not be able to make it safely to the other side without someone who is more mature, financially stable and worldly beside you…fear is what actually drives you to me.

I am so sorry but it is not love that you have for me….please see deeply into your heart and you will know that I am right.

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‘It is a common misconception to believe everyone can love and be loved in return. I say it is ‘common’ and a ‘misconception’ because the subject of love is perhaps the most misunderstood concept in the world. Since it is rarely ever discussed at lenght or depth. If you ask me. This has to be very odd because if you go to YouTube, there are people who will teach you how to spot fake from real news to even how to conduct your own experiment in the kitchen to tell the difference between real and plastic rice. But no one if you notice ever bothers to sit you down to share his or her view on what is real or false love. Not even your pastor, priest or even parents!

If this is not five Chili strange…I really don’t know what is. Everyone it seems to assume everyone already knows what love is….and that is the tragedy of our age. That is why so many relationships start only to fizzle out…that is also why there are so many divorces.

Wonder no more why most people don’t know what is love…..the funny thing is without knowing more about it that doesn’t seem to stop enormous numbers of people from searching for love.

So now we are in a very curious position in society. Most people don’t know what love actually is, but since they think they know what it is or maybe they believe the other side knows more about it – so they go into it!

This is how ignorance works. The less people know about a thing. The more stubbornly they hold on to it.

So let me share with you my personal version of what is and is not love and maybe you decide for yourself whether it makes sense. It first has to begin with knowing yourself. If you do not know who you really are, you cannot be in love. You only have the illusion that you are in love. That is why I often tell people who don’t know who they are…better you avoid love completely, don’t go there and just devote all your time to the scramble club or playing Pokemon Go.

Because if you don’t know who you really are. You will fear and fear will drive you to seek the worse possible version of what you believe to be love that will ultimately lead to suffering and unfulfilled yearnings.

Fear is the perfect mirror opposite of love. Hate is not the opposite of love, as most believe. Hate has nothing whatsoever to do with love.

The true opposite of love is actually fear. And that is why fear is perfect destroyer of love. As when one seeks love in fear. That love can never expand and grow, in fear love between two people can only die. It is like slow acting poison.

In fear self doubt will creep in, it is only a matter of time, even in the best relationships…it will… that is why fearful people in love are always clingy. They all without exception Velcro people…always want you to be beside them like their favorite side table. Furniture…to be there. Always. That is why insecure and fearful men look for level headed girls so that they can put their Tiger Beer and crackers on while they watch Football on TV. They will never dare to go for girls who can commune with their minds…that they fear most…real relationships. So they settle instead for furniture. A prosthetic.

In fear one doubts. One can only. However in love one trusts. In fear one equates separation and distance as a form of suffering. A form of virtual reality. In love separation is never an issue; in fear there is a need to posses and control and regulate to fashion the other person to be your God of the ideal. In love there is no need to posses, it is about appreciation, no control is necessary, it is about freedom. In fear there are endless expectations based on what must come to past in the future. In love there is no expectation as there is no need to control your other half in such a way where you would even need them to make you whole and complete…..you are already complete without your other significant half…so what is there to put in a box …that is the difference between love and fear.’

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